VIDEO: analysis of harms of SSM by Rhodes Scholar in Sydney

This is an excellent presentation, over dinner at Campion College Sydney. Sherif Girgis makes clear the inner logic of marriage and the centrality of the child in the existence of this institution.

One passage was especially thought-provoking as to the impact SSM would have on the image of marriage itself in the minds of children born into our radically altered culture:

Think of the first generation of kids that’s growing up in a society that’s post the redefinition of marriage. From Day One they’re going to be taught a couple of things:
One is that marriage is mainly about adult emotional satisfaction and not about the needs of kids.
Two, that what makes a marriage is a certain type of emotional connection, so that when that emotional connection is gone it’s inauthentic, it’s dishonest to stick with it.
And three, that moms and dads don’t contribute anything special to parenting, that they’re perfectly replaceable, and that in fact it’s bigotry to think otherwise.
If you grow up with those three ideas from Day One, which is what you will do if the law teaches those, and through the law the educational system and culture more generally, then you’re going to have much less motivation to stick with a marriage when the going gets tough; when exclusivity and permanence start taking an emotional toll – a toll on your personal satisfaction – when you have no more motivation to stick with it for the sake of the kids (a commonplace today, but something that will make much less sense if you come to think that moms and dads don’t contribute something special)…

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4 Responses

  1. Norah Taylor

    These are very thought-provoking points and indicates an increasing selfishness in our society. Marriage and children “on demand” as a right, rather than looking at the responsibilities and the emotional health of children. What worries me is that all this is probably already happening, regardless of the changes being advocated re same-sex marriage. Aren’t same-sex couples already allowed to foster or adopt children? Aren’t they already allowed to have children by sperm donations or overseas surrogacy? Is this shutting the door after the horse has already bolted?

    • AMF

      You are right, Norah, that some States (not all) allow same-sex couples to adopt children or use artificial reproduction such as surrogacy or IVF, and likewise some States allow single men or single women to obtain a child in this way. In all these cases the same core principle is being violated as with same-sex marriage-and-parenting: that no law should be allowed which would make it impossible for a child to be raised by both a mother and a father. So yes, those horses have bolted, but that just means they have to be rounded up and put back in the stable.

  2. Steven Rafter

    What I find interesting, frustrating and rather disturbing is the way, in which, this issue appears to divide people and challenge conservative ‘values’ to the core… to the point that often sensible people become quite irrational, emotional and even abusive… So, to put it into perspective of REALITY… it is this… EVERYONE has a right to EQUALITY and that equality is a basis, upon which all individuals should be regarded by the law. Whether you agree with it or not is ABSOLUTELY IRRELEVANT because EQUALITY is a HUMAN RIGHT… for those who base their discrimination on religious values – you really do need to re-exam those ‘teachings’ and have a good look at religion in the historical context of how it is more than often proved WRONG by science and evidence… For those who base their discrimination on grounds of homophobia – I would suggest that an examination of the reasons for homophobia are often deep-seated social conditioning that is linked to stifled self development and often evidenced by the questioning of your own sexuality… and for the rest of those individuals who are not in either camp (tee hee on word usage here)… and just ‘don’t like the change to the Australian Law – that I MIGHT POINT OUT – was only implemented under the previous liberal government a few years back, to change the law to identify marriage between a ‘man and a woman’ – there is a sense of mean spiritedness! The Commonwealth of Australia is NOT based on religious values – it is based on LAW. Fair and just law is based on SOCIAL JUSTICE and EQUALITY for all within a society…
    Thank you for reading…

  3. AMF

    You are right, Norah, that some States (not all) allow same-sex couples to adopt children or use artificial reproduction such as surrogacy or IVF, and likewise some States allow single men or single women to obtain a child in this way. In all these cases the same core principle is being violated as with same-sex marriage-and-parenting: that no law should be allowed which would make it impossible for a child to be raised by both a mother and a father. So yes, those horses have bolted, but that just means they have to be rounded up and put back in the stable.

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